15 Years Ago (almost to the day) I Wrote an Article That Went Viral.
Here’s What It Really Meant… and What I’ve Learned Since. Fifteen years ago, in my tiny Pennsylvania studio with lukewarm coffee and big dreams, I wrote a blog post titled:
“I Won’t Photograph Ugly People.”
As you can imagine, the internet lost its damn mind. Before anyone grabs their pitchforks again, it wasn’t about looks. It wasn’t vanity.It wasn’t even really about photography. It was about character. But the title was spicy enough that people didn’t bother reading past it before forming Very Loud Opinions™. And somehow, that little post, written on a hand-me-down desk while I was still figuring out what the hell I was doing in business and in life, exploded.
TIME.com.
HuffPost.Newspapers.
ABC News.
Blogs.
Radio stations…..across.THE.WORLD.
Everyone had something to say. Some called me brave. Some called me crazy. Some called me fat. Some clearly didn’t read the article. And some of the photographers I thought were my friends made themselves real comfortable in national comment sections , which was a fun little plot twist for my twenties. That sting sticks with you. But here’s the part I didn’t know at the time: That headline would end up meaning a lot more to me as I grew…as a woman, a mom, and an artist. Back then, I thought I was just standing up to a few mean girls. Turns out, I was learning how to stand up for myself.
What Really Happened
In August 2011, I had a normal senior session on my calendar… until I saw the girls’ Facebook posts and felt my stomach hit my kneecaps.
They weren’t just being snarky teenagers, they were full-on Mean Girls: Digital Edition, complete with a Facebook “burn book.” Cruel comments. Laughing. Tearing down another student like the internet wasn’t forever. So I did what any young photographer with a moral backbone and a half-charged laptop would do: I emailed their parents screenshots, refunded their money, and said:
“If you’re ugly on the inside, I’m not going to make you look beautiful on the outside.”
Then I wrote a blog post about it, not to shame them (I never named them, even when news stations begged me to), but because it felt like the only right thing to do. I had worked too hard building my business to represent kindness and authenticity… and then turn around and photograph people actively harming others. I hit publish. And the internet said, “Oh. Bet.”
Within days, the post exploded. TIME.com picked it up. The Huffington Post covered it. My tiny Indiana County studio became ground zero for national opinions…tons of them…about my decision, my ethics, and apparently my entire personality.
WHAT IT MEANT BACK THEN
Back then, it meant something pretty simple: I had boundaries, even if I didn’t know that’s what they were yet. It meant I wasn’t willing to make someone look picture-perfect while they were treating others like crap. It meant I wasn’t going to profit from cruelty or pretend it didn’t exist just because it came with a booking fee. It meant I believed photography was more than pretty pictures, it was a reflection of character, of who we are in the moment the shutter clicks. And it meant I was young, fiery, and completely unafraid to stand alone in my values. Looking back… I’m damn proud of that girl. She didn’t know it yet, but she was planting her first real boundary and strengthening her backbone.
WHAT IT MEANS NOW (15Years Later)
Fifteen years later, after motherhood, divorce, healing, therapy, rebuilding, and finally learning to value myself , the phrase “ugly on the inside” hits completely differently. And here’s the ironic part: the moment I refused to photograph bullies, the internet bullied me. Strangers tore me apart with the same kind of cruelty I was speaking out against. That was my first real taste of how loud people can get when they don’t understand you…and how similar adults can be to the very teenagers I was standing up to.
Life has a funny way of circling back to make sure you really learn the lesson. Here’s what life taught me:
1. Ugly behavior doesn’t stop at high school.
Sometimes it shows up in adults you trusted: friends, family, coworkers, community members. People who never learned emotional accountability. And I’m done making space for that.
2. Outgrowing people is not dramatic, it’s healthy.
Peace > validation. Silence is an answer. Boundaries are a love letter to your future self.
3. Beauty is easy to photograph.
Character is what shows up in the lens. You can’t fake connection. You can’t Photoshop sincerity. Integrity refuses to pose.
4. Who I photograph reflects what I value now.
Sentimental women. Families who adore each other. Seniors with kind hearts. Joyful, grounded couples. People who value emotion over perfection. You can see it in every gallery I share.
5. “I Won’t Photograph Ugly People” was never about judgment…it was about alignment.
And ….It still is.
WHAT I WOULD TELL 2011 ME
I’d tell her:
“Good job. This moment wasn’t just about the bullies, it was about you learning to choose yourself. This was your first boundary… the tiny spark that would eventually light the way for every single one you’d have to set later. You had no idea you were practicing for the big ones.”
FULL CIRCLE MOMENT
Fifteen years later, that decision feels less like a bold business move… and more like a premonition. It was the first time I ever said, even quietly:
“I don’t have to participate in someone else’s ugliness.”
I didn’t know it then, but that one decision became the seed of:
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the boundaries I’d eventually have to protect
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the toxic patterns I’d walk away from
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the cycles I’d work hard to break
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the relationships I’d outgrow
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the family dynamics I’d no longer tolerate
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the life I’d rebuild from scratch
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the peace I’d protect at all costs
Back then, it felt like it was just about four mean girls and one senior portrait session. But really? It was the first time I learned that I don’t have to make space for people who cause harm…even when it’s uncomfortable, even when it’s misunderstood, even when people don’t like it. It was the moment I chose values over validation. My first quiet rebellion. My first “I deserve better.” And the wild part? I had no idea how many times I’d have to say that sentence again but in far deeper, far more painful circumstances.
The Part No One Could Have Predicted
Fifteen years later, I’ve photographed thousands of people. I’ve traveled to places my younger self never imagined. I’ve stood on mountaintops, inside hospitals, in churches, on beaches, on boats, in backyards, and in living rooms documenting the moments that eventually become family history.
I’ve met CEOs, construction workers, stay-at-home moms, farmers, artists, physicians, athletes, business owners, and grandparents celebrating their fiftieth wedding anniversaries. I’ve photographed tiny backyard weddings and elaborate cultural celebrations. I’ve documented first babies, growing families, graduating seniors, and women learning to see themselves differently. I’ve watched people fall in love, become parents, start businesses, rebuild after heartbreak, and celebrate milestones they once thought they’d never reach. And every single person I’ve photographed has left a fingerprint on my life in some way.
That’s the part of this story no one could have predicted in 2011. A viral article may have put my name in front of millions of people. But photography? Photography introduced me to humanity. The internet remembered the headline.I remember the people.
A PhD in Resilience 😂
And listen… if I can survive being attacked virally when ‘going viral’ meant something VERY different than TikTok viral AND survive small town gossip….I think I’m more than qualified to speak on what ‘ugly on the inside’ really looks like. 😂
At this point, I’ve basically earned a PhD in resilience.”
But I did. And I survived. And I rebuilt. And I became the woman who can say …with her whole chest:
I’m allowed to walk away from people who are beautiful on the outside but damaging on the inside.
Full circle. Right back to that 2011 headline… only now I understand it in a way my twenty-something-year-old self couldn’t have possibly imagined. Today, it’s not just about clients. It’s about relationships. It’s about emotional safety. It’s about peace. It’s about the example I’m setting for my children. It’s about the life I’m creating with intention.
Today, I understand the weight of those words more than ever:
Ugly isn’t a face.
Ugly is behavior.
Ugly is cruelty.
Ugly is a pattern.
And kindness? Kindness photographs BEAUTIFULLY.
SO NOW WHAT?
So here we are, fifteen years later. Same moral. Different woman.
I still won’t photograph “ugly people.” Not because I’m judging anyone but because your photos should reflect who you truly are: Kind. Warm. Joyful. Real. Sentimental. Human. Loved. Growing. Authentic. Those are my people. Those are the stories I’m here to tell.
If you’ve been here since 2011, you absolutely deserve a loyalty card. You’ve survived my spicy headlines, my glow-ups, my heartbreaks, my mom era, my boundary era, my healing era, and now my “photograph people with good souls” era. Thank you for seeing me. Thank you for staying. And if you’re new here? Buckle up, babe. We’ve got stories to tell.
2011 — The Firestarter (“I Won’t Photograph Ugly People”)
2011 — The Clarification (“Here’s what I meant”)
2012 — The Aftermath (“What I Learned About Going Viral”)
