the drive – total randomness | southwestern, pa photographer | personal

There are three types of drives. For example, you have the “Running Late-Get out of my way drive”, the ” frustrated-I’m lost and don’t know where the hell I’m going drive” and then there’s the “therapeutic drive”. Today, after the bus came to get Mallory for the day at school, I packed myself into the car and took a therapeutic drive. Of course I had a reason for taking “the drive” in the first place, you know like finding an outfit to go on TV…eeek! (I’ll explain this a bit later in the month) but today’s drive…..well, I NEEDED it and I’ll explain…but it’s going to be all over the place and completely random-like I’ve mentioned before…it’s just how my brain works! I know most of you won’t read thru this whole blog because-well, quite frankly, it’s a long one…don’t worry, I won’t be mad! Come again, ya hear!?! LOL

Lately, (if you haven’t noticed) things in the corner of my inter webber have been KINDA CRAZY-even more so than normal! With that said, I feel like these past few weeks have been GO-GO-GO……..and then BOOM brick wall. I think I’ve been keeping up with all of my responsibilities to my clients, but I’m lacking just a bit in my personal life…..my family life. I have spent the past few weeks in front of the computer-or shooting-or in front of the computer-or shooting and I forgot to schedule myself some down time. For you photographers out there reading this, I KNOW YOU KNOW what I’m talking about. The hardest thing is when you LOVE what you do….it makes it hard to STOP. So you end up putting in long hours-longer than you should because you just love it so much. But lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about balance. There has to be a balance with my business and my family life. I’ve been trying to separate the two and closing the door and putting down the phone at a certain time so that I can spend time with the ones that mean the much to me. This is hard to do…….VERY HARD. I’m finding that while my body is present while Mallory is doing her homework and telling me ALL about her day at school….my mind is wandering to what I still need to get done in the studio or on the computer. I don’t like it….at all. When I went to do an “impromptu” talk at my old college, one of the students asked me, “What is the hardest thing about owning your own business”. The above answer is what I told him. I’d love to know what your answer would be……because mine certainly is balance!

So what’s my point…..the drive, it helps me to think and clear my head. Without all the “hey mommy, hey mommy” from the back seat when Mallory is with me. I’m able to just crank up the radio and think (yes I think with the radio on!! LOL). It’s a mindless therapuetic way to clear my head, to brainstorm-most of my ideas (the good ones anyways) come to me while I’m driving and I can’t write them down! haha! It’s my ME time………just me, the road and the my thoughts. So these are the random things (besides the above topic) that I thought about while taking “the drive”. Get ready for randomness!

I’m going to get the heavy stuff out of the way first. Those of you that know me REALLY well, know all about this but some of you are kind of new to the blog…so I will explain! Because I live in a smaller town, we don’t have the luxury like you city folk to have awesome places to shop close by. So this means anytime I really want to go shopping…I mean REALLY go shopping, it’s at least a 30-45 minute drive to the mall, stores, etc. I mean don’t get me wrong, I don’t live over the river and thru the woods but Walmart is not necessarily the place I want to shop all the time! With that said, during todays drive I had to drive thru a town that brings back a lot of not so good memories. I lost my sister 9 years ago. She was 17 when the car she was riding in wrapped around a tree and all three of the passengers died-instantly. I was 21 at the time, just getting ready to graduate from college and boom my sister dies. As I’m driving, I had to pass the place where her accident took place, the very tree that killed my sister. It’s raining and depressing out to begin with and then the song…the one song that makes me think of my sister “Song of the South” came on the radio-it’s a long story, but when we were  younger we would sing the song so loudly in the back seat…making up words when we didn’t know the real ones. It’s just a very fond memory I have of her. Silly I know…but I can’t control these things! lol As soon as the song came on, I lost it….bawling like a freaking baby. The people at the red light next to me probably wondered…What the hell….! I cried….and not just cried…I “ugly cried”…..and I messed up my makeup! haha! Not a great way to start the morning. THEN the weirdest thing happened. Just yesterday, Greg and I watched a movie called Ghost Town. I know we are a bit behind the times considering I think the movie came out in 2008. Anyways, I’ll spare you the details but basically anytime one of the “dead” people passed someone still alive, they’d sneeze! My point? As I pulled up to the red-light and I was doing my “ugly cry”….I sneezed, I freaking sneezed. I know you are all thinking I’m a quack about right now……but hey….I sneezed-just sayin! I miss her….like crazy….especially today!

On a WHOLE OTHER note, I realized that you tend to spend so much more money when it’s raining. It’s as if you don’t feel so bad that it’s crappy out side because you’re spending money inside….insanity! Here’s how I look at it, I hardly ever buy myself anything so today, I splurged….whoops! I deserve those new boots dammit, it’s raining outside……hahah! I’ve also noticed that I should probably get out and go shopping WAY more often….and with someone who knows what the heck they are doing! Fashion Police….feel free to arrest me! LOL I did find lots of stuff that I loved today and after I saw the initial total from the pile I placed on the counter, I justified it in my mind…it’s raining……and I sneezed….I NEED to spend this much! hahah! In all honestly, I needed this. One of the requirements from the producers of the show I’m going on at the end of the month required that I bring several outfits that were bright and colorful. I laughed at first because ….well that basically eliminated 90% of my wardrobe (if you want to call it a wardrobe) because you know…..wedding photographers wear black! haha! So this shopping trip helped put a little color….and little cheer back into my wardrobe!

To wrap up this week’s total randomness…I’m off to charge up my batteries. I’m shooting 2 weddings this weekend and I’m so looking forward to both of them……but before hand, I’m spending some QT time with the family. So here’s to balance, sneezes and the ride!  I guess if life is a high way…….we should all sit back and enjoy “the therapeutic ride….you know, without the ugly cry!!” 🙂

WORD! 🙂

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