what’s really in my bag (it’s invisible)

You know that saying, “pack light”? Yeah… I couldn’t even if I tried. Haha.

When I show up to a wedding, a family session, or a portrait shoot, sure, I’ve got my cameras, lenses, batteries, and memory cards… blah blah blah. But if we’re being honest, the heaviest thing I bring with me isn’t my gear bag…it’s the one filled with all the invisible stuff. It’s packed with every experience that’s shaped me. The good, the bad, the gut-wrenching, and the holy-wow-I-can’t-believe-I-made-it-through-that kind.

I’ve felt my way through life. And it shows up in my work.

• I know what it feels like to be the mom who always takes the photos but would just love to have one really good one of herself that wasn’t taken at arm’s length with a cell phone or in a mirror.
• I know what it feels like to be self-conscious about your body and hand your trust over to someone, hoping they’ll see you the way you want to see yourself.
• I know what it feels like to lose someone you loved so deeply and live with the regret of not taking enough photos.
• I know what it feels like to have life change so. very. quickly.
• I know what it feels like to want to freeze a moment because you know it’s the last time things will ever be exactly this way.
• And I know what it feels like to hold onto a printed photograph for comfort…something tangible to cling to when everything else has shifted.

Inside that invisible bag are things like losing my sister, navigating messy family dynamics, grieving people who are still alive, walking through divorce (in a small town, no less), the sting of friend breakups, and the wild, tender rollercoaster of anxiety and self-consciousness about my weight… just to name a few. But it’s also filled with joy, like raising my amazing kids, travel, new love, belly laughs, exciting milestones, late-night margaritas with friends, and the kind of celebrations that remind me how good it feels to be alive.

All of it comes with me.

Those experiences shape how I see people and what I look for when I’m behind the lens… and honestly, even how I view life. They guide how I talk to your grandma, how I notice the quiet glance between you and your dad, or how I sense when a moment is about to unfold before it even happens. Some of the tools in that invisible bag were built from hurt or pain. Some from joy. And a few from straight-up survival. But no matter how they got there, I’ve managed to tuck them all in and zip them up into the bag that comes with me to every session and every wedding I shoot.

What’s really in my bag isn’t just camera gear. It’s empathy, intuition, humor, resilience, and a whole lot of lived life. It’s the stuff you can’t see but you can feel in the photos. You can’t buy it, you can’t fake it, and it sure doesn’t fit in a camera bag…at least not for as much as I have! Haha.